My Search for Collaboration and Opportunity

                                                                                                  by Lisa Martin

I realize the importance of really getting involved in the community I have identified to be the central focus of my Capstone project – Newark, New Jersey.  I think it would be helpful to collaborate with those who share similar passions outside of the community of practice (CoP) I intend to form. I was surprised to find that there were so many organizations with similar objectives. The first group to capture my attention was the Newark Education Trust, “a non-profit local education fund focused on ensuring a quality education for all Newark children” (Local Talk News, 2011, paragraph 1). Not only would my CoP share their goal, but the membership of their collaboration is also very similar to what I have planned, with representation from the education, business, and community coming together. Another organization of interest, that supports the Trust, is the Newark Alliance which is a collaboration of higher education, local business, and state entities to improve education in Newark.

I also feel a great need to support my own personal commitment to lifelong learning. With that in mind I am interested in Education Pioneers, a national organization that understands the importance of having strong leadership and systems in place to support education. “They believe that for schools, districts, and systems to enable all children to achieve at high levels, we must focus on effective teaching and the quality of leadership and management of these schools, districts, and systems”; a belief I share (Education Pioneers, 2014, paragraph 1). In the past they have initiated projects in New Jersey, and a major effort was geared towards bringing talent to Newark. I believe that being involved in this type of organization will encourage me to constantly think outside the box and improve my practice.

Speaking of practice, I have been considering what opportunities might provide the best utilization of my education and talents. The first thing I need to do is create a resume as an early childhood professional, I have to be able to market myself even though I have no real preschool experience. I would love the chance to work with s dynamic organization like the Children’s Defense Fund, but there were no current postings other than a data entry position. The Goddard School was looking for a Program Director within reasonable travel distance here in New Jersey. I definitely want a more administrative/executive role, but if I am going to be a program director I will start my own center, which was my initial plan. Lately, I have been thinking about working with an established organization devoted to improving equity and access to quality education for all children, hence my desire to work with the Children’s Defense Fund.

I am going to create a resume highlighting my education at Walden coupled with my management and business accomplishments and send it to the United Nations Children’s Fund, Save the Children, St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital, the Children’s Defense Fund, and other organizations I discover that make huge contributions to helping children. I was so sure about what I wanted to do when I started this journey, but now I just feel the need to be in a position to impact the lives of the greatest number of children and families. I feel I can do more as a children’s advocate at CASA – Court Appointed Special Advocates, than overseeing my own small program.

Furthermore, the only positions available in early childhood in my state are teachers, administrators and associate administrators, and most of them require preschool teaching experience. I know that I could be a good teacher, but that is not my passion. I can step into an advocacy role without the teaching experience. I have the knowledge of child development, as well as the communication, organizational, and leadership skills that would make me an asset to any of the groups I mentioned. I also have a wealth of personal experience that makes me genuinely empathetic and compassionate. I am culturally competent, with a firm grasp on my own cultural framework, and an understanding of the influence of social and cultural identities, which allows me to interact well with all people. Unfortunately, I have been unable to identify any advocacy positions in my area. Hopefully, sending out my resume will generate interest and possibilities.

References:

Education Pioneers. (2014). Our mission and values. Retrieved January 18, 2014, from http://www.educationpioneers.org/what-we-do/our-mission-and-values

Local Talk News. (2011, January). Newark Education Trust launched to ensure quality education in Newark. Retrieved January 18, 2014 from http://localtalknews.com/newark/education/724-newark-education-trust-launched-to-ensure-quality-education-in-newark

I'm back...

It has been about six months since I last posted anything. My education journey is coming to an end as  enter the final lap of my Masters program. However, this final lap means that I will be required to post again, so you will be hearing from me.

Adjourning the Team

                                      By Lisa Martin

There are times when I cannot wait for phase five of a project to occur – adjourning, the end, and there are times when I hate to see a project come to a close.  There was the class project with the lack of leadership and varying degrees of commitment from the members that I wanted to end as soon as it began; and when it finally was over adjournment was like high school graduation with the phony good wishes scribbled in a yearbook.  We all wished each other luck and success in our studies, and did not speak of the hurt feelings, control issues, or failure to complete tasks displayed during the project. We had received a decent grade and that was all that mattered.

Projects at work tend to adjourn a little differently, as the end of the project is not really the end. Usually someone is assigned to follow up and provide oversight on the implementation of changes and evaluate whether or not the solution derived from the group project works as well in practice as it seemed it would in theory. If it was a major project, the type that saved jobs or cut costs, adjourning may include a champagne toast and a nice dinner on the company. Company- wide projects sometimes have that graduation-like component as we bid farewell to colleagues from out of town, offering well wishes and congratulations on a job well done.

My favorite adjournments result from my preferred type of team endeavor, event planning. In this instance, the adjourning occurs simultaneously with the culmination of our efforts. At the same time we are enjoying the idea of the project being completed, we are discovering how well we did. The greater the success of our project; the more fun we have during the adjourning stage. I have had events that were great achievements, and the team members let their hair down and enjoyed themselves alongside the people for whom they had planned the celebration. In a couple of instances, the leadership provided the team with thank you gifts for a job well done; this is my favorite type of adjourning. I have also had events that did not turn out so well, and the team spent the evening going over the things that went wrong, why they went wrong, and how they could be corrected in the future. Needless to say, this is among my least favorite ways of adjourning.

Effective Communication and Conflict Resolution

                                                                   By Lisa Martin

I am enjoying mastering the art of effective communication, and would love to apply some of my recent lessons on nonviolent communication, the three R’s and the third side to current disagreements or conflicts. Fortunately, I have not been involved in any disagreements in months, which is especially hard to believe when you take into consideration I have been married for more than twenty years.  I think this has more to do with not working and having limited interaction with others outside the home, and less to do with my communication skills. I know of conflicts and disagreements around me, but am not involved first hand.  I will for this assignment take the part of one of the main characters in a conflict brought to my attention today by a friend. Like they say on television, the stories are true but the names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Every year the church has a Father’s Day celebration for the Pastor, a dinner usually at the home of a member with several families from the church attending. This year they decided to do something different and have a catered affair. Aretha and I have organized the event and gotten a caterer we know to give us a huge discount, so it will only cost $25/person. We also have to cover the cost of the Pastor’s family which would be an additional $100. We suggest that each of the five families attending, contribute an addition $20, and immediately get two cancellations. Now there is a big disagreement because the members do not want to pay for the Pastor’s family. Aretha has offered to pay the entire $100, but I am opposed to this because it is not fair to her. At this point we are simply trying to contain and hopefully resolve the situation with the next forty-eight hours.

One thing I realize right away is that we should have asked the families for suggestions and if each of them donating twenty more dollars was a feasible option, but we presented it more as a demand not giving any other option. We also failed to give any consideration to the possible validity of their opposition to paying for the Pastor’s children.  We never went to the balcony to get a new perspective. We are calling another meeting to discuss the arrangements and asking that the families that dropped out, and others who may want to participate also attend. We will assume the third side, asking open ended questions and seeking other ideas to cover the cost. We will also discuss the pros and cons of paying for the Pastor’s children. I think that once we openly discuss this rather small issue and hear the reasons for the objections, and respond to them with compassion and honesty we will be able to reach a compromise and resolve the situation. Rather than control the meeting Aretha and I will serve as objective mediators and bridge the gap to compromise, serving as peacemakers.

 

Evaluating My Communication Style

                                                By Lisa Martin

I have to admit I was very curious to see what my family and colleagues thought of my communication style, if they thought I was overly aggressive or nervous when I spoke. I was surprised to find that there was not much difference in how I perceive my communication skills and how my sister and co-worker rated them. I often think I come off too aggressive, but my evaluators actually found me less moderately aggressive than I judged myself to be. We were all within the moderate range, but they gave me lower scores. I was glad to learn I am not the aggressor I thought I was, as this was a concern I had as I contemplated how to better communicate with families and colleagues in the early education field. I had always been told I have a tendency to be bossy, and I want very much to be a team player on equal footing with everyone else. Yes, I want to lead, but primarily by example. Overall, the tests and the similarity in scores gave me a definite feeling of “self-adequacy, as the assessment of my communication competence were acceptable, and gives me a desire for self-improvement” (O’Hair & Weimann, 2012, p. 53).

I was also pleased to learn that I come across as confident and self-assured in my communications. While I scored myself as being at the mild level for communication anxiety, my evaluators scored me as being at the low anxiety level. I think this goes to show that we are often our toughest critics. I know that being comfortable communicating in a variety of situations will make it easier for me to build the kind of relationships I want with colleagues, parents, caregivers, and children.

This exercise demonstrated to me how important it is to effectively communicate so that people get from you what you want them to come away with. I want people to speak with me and walk away knowing I was listening and I heard them, even if I did not agree with them, according to my family member and colleague I do that. “I understand that people want to feel heard more than they care about whether I agree with them” (Walters & Fenson, 2000, p. 1). I know this is a rather corny cliché, but I want my communication and behavior to reflect who I am – what you see and hear is who I am. I never want to feel I need to put someone down to lift myself up or make someone’s ideas appear stupid to support my own ideas. I believe I have the communication skills and integrity to achieve this goal and successfully influence others and advocate for equity and social justice. I look forward to continued improvement of my communication skills to be a most effective leader and professional.

O’Hair, D. & Weimann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction (2^nd ed.). Boston, MA: Bedford/St. Martin’s

Walters, J., & Fenson, S. (2000). A crash course in communication. Retrieved from http://www.inc.com/articles/2000/08/20000.html

 

 

Ways to Improve My Communications

                                                          By Lisa Martin

I am learning so much about the art of effective communication, and my shortcomings as a communicator. This course is making me pay closer attention to how I speak and listen to others, and I am discovering I am not the great communicator I thought myself to be. For years, my family and close friends have told me I have different styles of speech depending on to who I am speaking, which I adamantly denied. Now I listen to me and I know exactly to what they refer. My speech takes on a more sophisticated and structured form when I am discussing business or simply at work. At work I operate from a position of centralized power. On the other hand, when I get around my family power is of little importance and my tone is more relaxed, with less attention paid to vocabulary choices and grammar. When I am around just my girlfriends or a group of younger people I tend to use slang and try very hard to sound cool and worldly. I think that these communication changes from group to group make me a more effective communicator with each particular group. Most importantly, I am always listening to those around me, and believe I am a good listener.

As I consider ways to improve my communication, listening is not an area I will be focusing on, although I know there is room for improvement. My first strategy for improving my communication skills will be to get a better handle on my use of body language. I would like to begin with controlling or eliminating some of my adaptors. I sometimes unconsciously repeatedly tuck my hair behind my ears or brush back my bangs though it is uncalled for; it is a sort of nervous reaction when I am talking to a client. I also tend to shake or bounce one leg during difficult negotiations.  I believe these physical gestures are seen for what they are a lack of certainty at that moment, and in order to be perceived as totally confident I need to control them. I also need to work on my masking skills. People can often take one look at me and know something is bothering me or I do not agree with what they are saying. It will serve me well when speaking with families and colleagues within the early childhood field if my “expression represented an appropriate feeling or response to any given interaction” (O’Hair & Weimann, 2012, p. 136).

The area I want to focus on the most for improvement is cultural context and intercultural communication competence. I need to understand how different identities and schema may influence the reception of my messages by others. If I am to be a successful anti-bias early educator, I must be able to speak to people in a way that will result in the most positive perception and reception of my ideas. “This calls for constant self-reflection and the ability to reflect on influences and the nature of the influences themselves” (Vuckovic, 2008, p. 48). I will need to study the behaviors of different cultures, and understand the history behind beliefs and customs. If I listen well enough and ask the right questions, I will gather enough knowledge of others to be able to ascertain what they might want and what is most important to them. This knowledge will allow me to use the platinum rule on occasion.

I want very much to support the children and families I serve, by improving their equity and quality of life. I want to be able to lead by example through my advocacy and teach them to advocate and stand up for their children. The only way I can achieve these goals is by constantly working to become a more effective communicator, competent in intercultural communications.

O’Hair, D. & Weimann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction (2^nd ed.). Boston, MA: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

Vuckovic, A. (2008). Inter-cultural communication: A foundation of communicative action. Multicultural Education and Technology Journal, 2(1), 47–59.

 

 

 

 

 

Turn Up the Volume Please – Maybe Not

                                      By Lisa Martin

These communication blogs are becoming quite challenging. I watch a good deal of television, but this week I had to watch a show I had never seen, without sound. The only thing I like to watch without sound is some ball games because the commentators are annoying. I was also not interested in watching a new show. I chose a program called Family Tools, because an actress from an old show I liked stars in it. It is a thirty minute sitcom, and after a great deal of rewinding this is what I deduced without sound.

The show begins with an older man lying on kitchen floor with his hand on his chest – perhaps he fell or is having a heart attack. A younger man and woman go about getting breakfast, all while an intense disagreement is taking place. I know they are arguing because the old man is yelling and the woman is using exaggerated facial expressions to convey her disappointment and disgust, her nonverbal cues include eye rolling, head shaking and finger pointing. She is also doing some sort of negotiating with the older man as I see paramedics waiting for ok to enter home, and she holds up her hand in a wait gesture and looks to old man for a response. I never knew I could read so much from the body language and facial expressions of others. I see the sarcasm in the woman’s face, as well as the exasperation in the man’s face.

As I continue to watch the program, I deduce that the older man is reluctantly handing over the family business to his son due to health issues. He does not seem to have much confidence in his son, and they do not communicate, the aunt is always playing arbitrator. They have a handy man type business, and between the few employees and potential customers they are surrounded by some interesting and eccentric characters. The son’s assistant is of little help, as in one scene he is holding a puppy, which I think the son is trying to get him to get rid of, while the truck is being robbed. The attractive young woman who works in the shop flirts with the son. Of course, I would have had a much better idea of what was happening were this a program I had seen before or better yet watched regularly.

I actually did pretty well without any sound. The younger woman is the old man’s sister and he is having a heart attack. She is denying him medical attention until he agrees to retire and take care of himself, so I was correct about the negotiating. The old man reluctantly hands the repair business over to his son. The son and the assistant are a pair of incompetents, who constantly argue; rather than really communicate with each other they talk about the other in their presence to third parties via cell phones, pretending they are talking about someone else. The sister is extremely sarcastic, and because it’s television her facial expressions are overemphasized. I found the show to be stupid and far from funny, and expect it to be canceled quickly.

On the other hand, I learned people say a lot without speaking. The affect displays, kinesics, and illustrators seemed magnified, but that may be a by-product of bad acting. A horrible show is equally bad with or without sound, actually it was a bit better in silence, as you can only guess at the corniness of the lines being spoken.